Police Versus The Public

The NYPD have pretty much fired mayor Bill De Blasio and for good reason.  De Blasio wasted little time tossing New York's finest under a police van.

Last night police unions and the mayor had a kiss-and-makeup chat. De Blasio remains defiant and unapologetic.  So the cops are slow-rolling now.

Some people say police use too much muscle.  In 2013 there were 660,000 arrests.  Two arrests are causing all the hand-wringing.

SWAT teams wear converted military helmets, bullet proof vests, and ferocious firearms to subdue the extra bad guys.  But why is that a problem?  Don't we want perps cuffed and the police protected?

BulletSafe wants to replace military helmets with ballistic baseball caps.  The caps are lighter, cooler, and look less intimidating.  The company's crowd-funding the idea - so here's your chance to intervene in the battle between police image and police protection, folks.

CDC: Flu Epidemic Alert

Did you get a flu shot for H3N2?   If not, you are gonna get sick - really sick...

The flu season started on December 20th and already twenty-two states have over 2500 stricken - 15 dead kids among them...

Apparently H3N2 has mutated rendering the flu shot null and void.

So if you're over 65 or under 4 you better get a hospital bed lined-up...and even if you're between those ages exposure to schools kids, co-workers and other Walmart shoppers is a lock to five-solid days of down time.

On average flu kills about 24,000 Americans each year. This year the threat is somewhere north of that number.

Bill Cosby Hires Smear Soldiers

While the Cos has been getting laughs since 1962 he's also allegedly been date-raping since the 60s too. At least if you believe the two dozen plus ladies that claim he 'did it.'

Two dozen? Well Slate says there are twenty-seven to be exact. Which begs the question: how many alleged rapes does it take before the smoking gun turns out to have Bill's fingerprints on it?

Cosby and his wife says he didn't do it.  And the icon is allegedly paying a cadre of private-dicks six-figures to dig up dirt on his accusers now.

Is it possible to damn the guy based on the sheer number of rape accusers?  Or is it still required that at least one charge, indictment, arrest, conviction and/or sentence happen first?  Anyone?

Obamacare Suicide Watch 2015

The misnomer Affordable Care Act AKA ObamaCare has been in the wild for two years now.

Two seconds after Pelosi puffed no-need-to-read-the-phone-book-sized-screwup SCOTUS likewise failed to read the law and let it stand.

But 2015 is when all the poop hits the fan...

First up on Thursday the Obama delayed ninety-nine or more employee-employer mandate kicks corporate America in the ball-sack.

Also expiring on Thursday are the Obamacare Medicaid payment bonuses paid-out in 2013 and 2014. That was money stolen from Medicare.

Then sometime in May or June SCOTUS gets a second chance to redeem itself when it applies the nifty suicide-bomber Obamacare language affecting 80% of the 6 million that have enrolled who need a subsidy to keep their insurance. The 34 states that didn't set-up an exchange don't owe the money, apparently.

Stay tuned, the train-wreck that is Obamacare is getting a couple of atomic wedgies in 2015 folks.

Science: Mind Only Workouts Work

The holiday food frenzy leads to feared weeks of bone, muscle and tendon crushing workouts.

But science says why sweat at all?

A study published in the Journal of Neurophysiology says just imagining exercise can increase brain function, tone and strengthen muscle and delay atrophy.

No mention whether fat fantasies can thin your thighs. But hey why not try....sure beats pounding your ass on a Pilates machine, right?

DOJ: Tribes Can Grow Pot

Did you know American Indian tribes are exempt from Obamacare tax penalties and have their own government and cops?

So when Oregon, Washington and Colorado 'legalized' killer weed some tribes wondered if they could catch the Cannabis train too.

Surprise! Holder's DOJ just gave them the a-okay.

Tribes aren't subject to state and local taxes, allowing them to undercut off-reservation sales.  So like the casino boom, cheap reefer looks like another hookah full of happiness for the reservation folks.

The Indians were nearly wiped out from smallpox, alcohol and tobacco so why not turn the few working natives left into a bunch of jobless junkies, right?

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McDonald's Drive-Thru Burger Beef

Demetri Johnson, 21, got a sack of fast-food at a Tennessee McDonald's drive-thru last night.  And like many, Johnson noticed a missing cheeseburger soon after driving off.

But unlike most, Johnson decided to return to the eatery and correct the problem by sticking a handgun in a burger-flippers face.  Seems he wanted the missing cheeseburger and upped the ante to include extra fries and bubbly drinks. 
 
Johnson's at large, for now.   If you see this guy or notice an empty bag of Mickey-Dees in the backseat of a car, call the cops - no telling what this guy is capable of, folks.

Luminous Lingerie Lights-Up The Loins

Looking for a libidinous, lecherous, lascivious, lustful, low-down and lubricious way to find her in the middle of the night?

Check out LuminoGlow's lights-up-in-the-dark lingerie.  The attire ends nighttime fumbling and may just save your marriage.

The magic happens because the naughty nighties are made from 'illuminating glow lace.'

Wearing them more than once a week may require a lead vest and panties, though.  But what the heck, she's worth it, right?

Ten Tainted Tourist Traps

Ever fantasize going to far away exotic places? Well fuhgetaboutit..
.
Prior to packing your khakis and cabana shirts and joining millions in the same plane, cruise ship, rickshaw, hotel, hostel and cafe you're gonna wanna check this list of tourist trampled towns first...

10. Belize City - Crime. Drugs. Dilapidation. A vibe that screams avoid-being-out-after-dark. This shithole in Central America has been a whorehouse since Columbus crossed it looking for the Pacific Ocean.

9. Cairo - ancient wonders and modern horrors await. Even if you avoid being molested by a radical Muslim you still face the WHO warning that a day in Khere-Ohe is equivalent to a smoking a lung-wrecking pack a day of camel dung.

8. New Delhi - the "Government Tourist Office" scam; The "Hotel Commission" scam; The "Fake Train Station" scam; The "Airport Transfer" scam are among a few to ponder before arriving.

7. Jakarta, Indonesia - choked with traffic, pollution, poverty and tourists just like you the city takes no prisoners and offers no condolences when you rabbit out of there the second you realize your mistake.

6. Lima, Peru - can any city have more wretched poverty, smog, kidnapping danger and bad food than Mexico City?  Oh sure you can buy a fedora hat made from alpaca hair but you can stay home and save yourself an amoeba infection too.

5. Los Angeles - earthquakes, race riots, horrific traffic, smog, gang-bangers and loud sirens lull you while meandering among a city of millions with no definable boundary. If you don't drive don't bother, if you do drive don't drive there...

4. Timbuktu, Mali - are you kidding?

3. Paris - rude waiters, long lines, chain smokers, and stolen art from German Jews. Whoever among your friends tells you Paris is the place to be is too far-gone to remain a friend...

2. Sydney & Melbourne - feel the fracas! For 177 years these two penal colony towns have a had blood feud that makes the Hatfield and McCoys look like an Amish barn-raising..

1. Tijuana, Mexico - drug cartel central. Welcome to corrupt cops, syphilitic whore houses, dead beggars on sidewalks, tequila dives and swine flu cafes. Given up on fun? Trek to Tijuana and never travel again.

Gay Pay Pays

Did you know that since 2010 corporate profits and investor returns are above the records set in 1929?

Did you also know that incomes for blacks are down 10.9%, down 9.6% for those 26 and younger and down 7.5% for unmarried mothers?

Slicing the numbers sexually; lesbian women get 20% higher wages than straight women and gay men get 16% less than straight men.

The obvious point? Avoid being a black lesbian under age 26 and pregnant. At least while Obama is president.

Toy Heist Foiled At Walmart

'Tis the season to be blowing big bucks unless of course you don't have the big bucks. 

Tarus Scott, 30, and Genard Dupree, 27, filled a Walmart cart with $369.94 in goodies, including a disturbingly bright pink motorized Barbie Power Wheel. 

The pair positioned the plunder near a store exit.  Then as planned, Dupree hit the floor clutching his chest faking a heart attack.

As the store staff rushed to help Dupree, Scott precipitated for the parking lot with the cart full of crap. Dupree then jumped up and ran to join Scott speeding off in a SUV in great haste.

The cops fingered them from store videos. Tarus and Genard are today in Polk county jail on fresh felony grand theft charges.  Prior to being locked up both were admonished not to talk about the Barbie Power Wheel in jail, you know, for their own safety. 

Court Rules Obama's Amnesty Unconstitutional

Federal District Judge Arthur Schwab has ruled that Obama’s executive actions go “beyond prosecutorial discretion” and into the realm of legislating. A power not granted to a president under the constitution.

“President Obama’s unilateral legislative action violates the separation of powers provided for int he United States Constitution as well as the Take Care Clause, and therefore, is unconstitutional."

The ruling has only stopped Obama in his tracks if he actually signs an exec order...so far he's been issuing memos instead.

Will a smug Obama now defy a federal court and enter the realm of criminal conduct?

Perp Paints Gun Red To Fool Cops

The law requires airsoft guns present a quarter-inch wide blaze orange tip or a blaze orange stripe one inch thick on both sides of the barrel.

Removing the paint is punishable by law in many states.

Just four days after Ohio created a bill to require toy guns be brightly marked 23-year-old crack-head Orlando Lowery painted his .380 caliber semi-automatic handgun red.  Lowery was arrested in Cincinnati for illegally concealing the gun and having 9grams of crack on him.

Wonder why Orlando wanted his real gun to be mistaken for a toy gun?

Airline Seat Selection Exposes You

Fight OR flight is the instinctive reaction primates have when confronted with danger. Fight ON a flight is the instinctive reaction travelers get when they don't get the seat they want...

Psychologists have studied the ugly seat selection syndrome and can list your personality defects based on an aisle, center or window seat preference. Ready?

Window people are xenophobes. They need a wall on one side and an empty seat on the other. They claim it's about sight-seeing and privacy despite being on the same flight a thousand times and who expects privacy in a sardine can like the cabin of a Boeing 747?

Center seat people are cowards. They fantasize being tucked tight between two people in the event of a crash. They're also masochists with no sense of self-worth or need for an armrest. They also have really small bladders.

Aisle people are power miscreants. They control the row and badger the flight crew. No need to ask anyone to go pee they dominate the aisle too.

So next time you saunter down the middle of the plane peer into each person's eyes before you sink into your own neurotic seat selection. The lunatic sitting next to you may be you...

Dumbest Cities Are In CA

Half of the top ten dumbest cities are in California; the state ranking 50th in education.  

From dumbest to least dumbest:

1. Lake Havasu City-Kingman, AZ
2. Dalton, GA
3. El Centro, CA
4. Farmington, NN
5. Hanford-Corcoran, CA
6. Madera, CA
7. Houma-Thibodaux, LA
8. Visalia-Porterville, CA
9. Merced, CA
10. Vineland-Bridgeton, NJ 

Why is California failing so miserably?

For starters the 'progressives' in California have turned state sovereignty over to Hispanics who arrive poor, illiterate, unable and unwilling to learn and speak English.

California is a laboratory experiment proving how NOT to run a state.

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Sharpton's Simple Solution

Al Sharpton says blacks can't be expected to be decent, law abiding, contributing members of society unless the government (taxpayers) pay for it.  To wit: 'You can't kill a jobs bill and infrastructure and then tell men to take care of their families. You can't have it both ways.'

When New York city was under siege during the race riots of the 1960s mayor John Lindsay tried handing out cash to keep the blacks quiet.

During one city meeting, a black woman stood up and pronounced, “I’ve got six kids, and each one of them has a different daddy. It’s my job to have kids, and your job, Mr. Mayor, to take care of them.”

Isn't that what you really mean Al? 

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NJ School Screw Up

New Jersey and just four other states spend twice as much per grade-school student as any other state.

Yet the Paterson New Jersey school district just revealed a miserable 19 out of 600 students got high enough SAT scores to qualify for college.

School officials blame racial bias in the testing, of course. And now the administrators say they will not use SATs to gauge student success.

Surprise!

Not to worry.  California ranks dead last at 50th.   Flailing New Jersey still has room to fall.

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Homeless Harassed In San Jose

Silicon Valley sports massive homes of the nouveau riche at one end of Coyote Creek and the largest homeless ghetto in the USA at the other end.

The 68-acre 'Obamaville' has been 'home' to some of the 7600 'homeless' wandering the streets around Santa Clara Valley.

So after half a decade of 'tolerance' the city of San Jose is bulldozing the place.

San Jose rationalizes the house cleaning alleging they're spending $4 million in taxpayer bucks to bail the unwashed out.  How novel...

Locals blame the high cost of housing but the truth is less benign.   Record poverty and the subprime housing crash are the real culprits.  Both appropriately blamed on Democrats and Obama.

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Harvard: Lefties Earn Less Than Righties

About one in eight people are left-handed.

Harvard professor Joshua Goodman crunched pay-data from the US and the UK and found left-handed people have 10 to 12% LOWER annual earnings than right-handed people.

Goodman notes, 'lefties work in more manually intensive occupations than do righties, further suggesting that their primary labor market disadvantage is cognitive rather than physical.'

Goodman piles on adding, 'lefties have more emotional and behavioral problems, have more learning disabilities such as dyslexia, complete less schooling, and work in occupations requiring less cognitive skill.'

Obama is left-handed. So is Bill Clinton.  But then so is George H.W. Bush and Darrell Issa.  Go figure...

Court Rejects Human Rights For Monkeys

The Nonhuman Rights Project wasted a chunk of change trying to get an appeals court to assign human rights to monkeys.

Tommy, a 26-year-old chimpanzee is not entitled to the rights of a human and cannot be taken from its owner ruled the five-judge panel of the New York Appeals court.

'So far as legal theory is concerned, a person is any being whom the law regards as capable of rights and duties,' Justice Karen Peters wrote.

'Needless to say, unlike human beings, chimpanzees cannot bear any legal duties, submit to societal responsibilities or be held legally accountable for their actions,'

If true, most liberal activists would likewise be denied said 'human rights' under the law, but since many of them have enough money to contest that notion in court, the rest of us are stuck with them...

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Kids Panic As Santa Jumps In Police Van

Did you think Santa was dead just because a bunch of atheists have a hard-on for anything connected with Christmas?  Think again...

Rhondda Cynon Taf in Wales brought Santa Claus to town along with a sled, live reindeer and a bag of toys.  The old guy left the kids feeling pretty puffed-up as they locked in their toy orders.

At the end of the day Santa bummed a ride from the cops and that's when the kids became confused and consternated.   After all, he was getting arrested, right?

"There were a lot tears – people couldn’t believe it actually happened. My four-year-old cousin started crying saying, ‘Santa can’t bring me toys now,'” one uncle noted.

The lesson?  Don't let the kids see Santa farting or belching - that's what dad does, not the guy that brings them toys on Christmas Day...

Early Death Predicting Exercise

Caution: This 'exercise' may make you take your own life or wish you were dead - so do this at your own risk.

Get barefoot and squat without using your hands and without moving a foot to steady yourself.  Now rise back up again without using your hands or falling over.

Deduct one point for each screw-up.  What are those?  Using your hand, falling over, farting, or being unable to reach the floor or rise above your ankles. Every point means a 21% greater chance of dying in the next five years. 

If you get ten points, you are through.  Call your lawyer and your funeral home and don't tell your kids...They will surround you like pack of hyenas ready to feast on a dying wildebeest.

BB Gun Bandit Gets 374 Years

The LA Times is reporting the sentence of serial home invader Jose Lewis Avila aka 'Cal Bear Bandit.'

Other than getting an astonishing prison stretch of 374 years the Times is happy to give his age of 33 years, but not his immigration status. Remember, Los Angeles is sanctuary city which ignores criminal illegal aliens.  But we digress...

Avila's MO was unique. He specifically targeted women driving alone and cunningly followed them home.  After pulling a bandanna over his face he robbed them at BB gunpoint.

Jose might have gotten off easier had he just stuck to robbery.  But he shot one woman in the face and that got him an extra 350 years.

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Farrakhan: 'Tear This Goddamn Country Apart'

Louie Farrakhan's fear-mongering over Ferguson was mounted at Morgan State U in Baltimore on Saturday.  The self-anointed Muslim menaced, 'we’ll tear this goddamn country apart!'

But the crowd really fired up with his churlish, 'We going to die anyway. Let’s die for something.'   Sorta like the black version of Dulce Et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori...

Farrakhan then commanded parents with teens to fire up the Molotov cocktails.  'Teach your baby how to throw the bottle if they can...,' complete with an overhand-overhead gesture.

Why isn't Farrakhan detained for terroristic threats?  Maybe what's protecting Louie is covering Al Sharpton's tax fraud rear-end?  Must be black privilege, huh?

Remember, Hitler was thought a clown in the beginning too...

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