PETA: Beef Blocks Sex

“Meat and dairy clog your arteries and can lead to erectile dysfunction.” PETA's billboard blasts near downtown Dallas.

PETA VP Tracy Reiman said, “PETA’s cheeky billboard will have Dallas diners swapping that deadly date-night steak for a vibrant veggie burger in a heartbeat.”

Sure it will.  What's the real beef Tracy?  Confess.

Gore On A Mission From God?

After decades of pulpiteering spurious prophecy snake oiler Al Gore is flaming out.   So what's the shyster to do?

Gore's doubling down on his film "Inconvenient Truth" and releasing “An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power.”  

Gore pronounces, “God intends for us to take responsibility for how we treat God’s creation...the consequences are attributable to us...I think God intends for us to open our eyes and take responsibility for the moral consequences of our actions.”

Gore the Holy Crusader for Climate Change!   Al's hubris reaches it's full efflorescence zenith.

Crazed Ken Doll Collection

Mattel says sales slides force Ken & Barbie to change.

Ignoring the anachronistic names Ken and Barbie as the possible culprits the company is instead remaking dolls in THEIR version of customer's image.

Last year Barbie showed up fat, svelt and somewhere in between topped with blond, red, blue and Afro style hair. 

Yesterday Ken showed up the same strange way.

Ken now ranges from the corpulent, bespectacled Michael Moore model to the oddly inappropriate Jihadi version complete with suicide bomb and AK47.  Oh and lets not leave out the man-bunned ambiguously gendered tranny model too.

So will the little girls (and gender confused boys) go for the new lines?  Or will the two dolls and the kids that buy them get replaced by androids in the end?  Stay tuned.

Pee Privilege Panic

Northern Arizona University is admonishing students to park their “pee privilege.”  Defined as, “never [having] to think about gender identity, ability, or access when peeing.”

Anonymous school officials say transgender students are getting hammered with verbal, sexual, and physical abuse somewhere near the urinals. 

So pee-ers must “Keep yourself accountable...this person...[doesn't] fit into either restroom.” 

The truth is jack-booted feminists resent sitting to pee.  And the transgender pee policy is just the de jure deflection of the day.

Chocolate Milk From Brown Cows

We know the public is dumb because at least half of them vote for Democrats.

And we don't expect much from kids.  For example a 2011 study found half of 4th, 5th, and 6th-grade students didn't know pickles were cucumbers or that onions came from plants.

But what about the 'grown-up?'

The U.S. Dairy Innovation Center surveyed over 1,000 adults in April and found nearly 10% thought brown cows make chocolate milk.  No one dared ask them where cows come from, luckily.

The 'backward' people from farming communities knew the answers. 

But the Obama/Hillary voters living in big blue cities like New York, Chicago, San Francisco and Los Angeles are the loose-cannons that don't know where basic foods come from, folks.

2.2 Billion Obese

A third of the world's population are now clinically obese.  Doubled since 1990.

Not talking bulky, big boned, bulging, bovine, beer-bellied, or chortling chubalitos.  We refer to full blown flabanatted fat farms.

And it's killing people faster than any other disease and crippling them with type 2 diabetes, hypertension, liver disease and cancer.

Man Blows Big Bucks Becoming An Elf

Some say the 'old' bi-gender designation M/F is obsolete.   So why not obliterate the entire idea of Homo Sapien and become an Elf?

Luis Padron, 25, from Buenos Aires, was bullied as a kid.  So he escaped into a fantasy world of fictional creatures, literally. 

After blowing $32,000 on liposuction, nose/ear job, skin  bleaching, full body hair removal and permanent eye color change the goon has morphed into an Elf.

But Padron ain't done yet.  He's still gotta get a heart-shaped hairline and a limb lengthening to reach 6ft 5in tall.  Who says Elves are tiny turds?

Padron is ridiculed more now than ever and won't ever get a date on

But Elves are known for sexual threats, seducing people and causing harm.  So Padron's real motives are not all that mysterious.

Coffee Shop's Rape Sign?

Leftists came up with 'safe spaces' to suppress free speech.   And soon after coined 'rape culture' to demonize white males.

The two concepts came together when a Brooklyn coffee shop mounted a humorous bathroom sign, left.

'How is anyone supposed to feel safe?' wrote Instagram user arteye. 'You're normalizing rape culture and sexual assault against women or any person who would be bothered by someone peeking in on them in the bathroom."

Clever Roast owner Luca Tesconi says, 'I like to make jokes, so I googled funny bathroom signs.' 

Wife Nadia Tesconi suspects the much-ado-doo-about-nothing kicked-off when a customer got upset laptops are not allowed during busy times.

But after death threats started the Tesconi's took the sign down.  And oh yea, laptops are still not allowed during busy times.