Boozed, Bruised, Smothered In Flesh Zeppelins

Two-hundred pound 38-DD Donna Lange, 51, from Everett, Washington, and her 5-7 boyfriend were boozing it up in their travel trailer over the weekend.

Witnesses said they heard a man's muffled pleas coming from the aluminum-clad Caravan.  And then an eerie silence.

Donna and her giant boobs had passed out top of her party pal. Donna had suffocated the smaller male. Some of Donna's hair was clenched in the dead  man's hand - a telltale sign the guy didn't go quickly.

Her massive magumbos muffled the immobilized man like a mound of mud over a mountain monastery .  The doomed male was pronounced dead at the scene and Donna was taken into custody. The charge? Second-degree manslaughter.  In Everett it's against the law to smother a man with monster mau maus

Three months ago Franziska Hansen, 33, from Unna, Germany tried to kill her boyfriend in the same way. Tim Shmidt, Franziska's boyfriend tearfully told the court ‘She was sitting on me naked and I was kissing her breasts. Suddenly she grabbed my head and pushed between her breasts with all of her force..I couldn't breathe any more, I must have turned blue. I couldn't tear myself free and I thought I was going to die.'

Well there you have it. The new female equalizer - 38DD (doubledee) twin turbo face wrappers. NO permit needed to conceal and carry.  Deadly from either end.  Men are forewarned to stay away from there.

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