Sitters are left exposed to multitudinous misshapen and disfiguring distortions of the gluteus maxiumus too hideous to list here.
Research at Tel Aviv University revealed fat cells thrive in the buttocks causing thick layers of flub to develop deep inside muscle tissue. And worse.
Chris Jones, physiologist says ‘The hip flexor muscles, found at the front of the hip, become overactive and tight if an individual spends all day sitting and in response, the three key muscles that give the buttocks their shape – the gluteus maximus, gluteus medius and gluteus minimus – become less responsive and generally under active, leading to poor muscle tone.’
Women are most vulnerable because they store fat in the ass first, says Jones. ‘This is due to an enzyme called lipoprotein lipase, which dictates where fat settles in the body. Females store more fat around the hips.'
Okay, now you have the science, and the obligatory warning - so what?.
The remedy involves squeezing your ass-cheeks several times a day. And don't squeeze from front to back or you will leave your rump radicalized and your vagina powerful enough to snap-off a sex toy or well, you know...other things.