Clown Crushes Kids For Cash

Parents in Naples, Fl say they have a new, potent child rearing weapon - his name is Wrinkles The Clown.

Wrinkles told WAPO he gets a few hundred in cold-clown-cash to prank parties and course-correct indecorous kids.

On mom signed-on the jaundiced jester to jostle her junior jackanapes.

“He was scared of clowns and I showed up across the street from him at the bus stop and he just started crying in front of his friends and ran home...his mother called back a few days later and said ‘Thank you!’ Now when he acts bad, she just has to ask him: ‘Do you want Wrinkles to come back?’”

Create a future serial killer, or get the kid one of these. Your choice folks.