Dig Up Dead Confederates

The black mayor of Memphis, A C Wharton wants to dig up the long dead Confederate General Nathan Bedford Forrest.

Why?  Because the Confederate flag and a Civil War general are to blame for the Charleston church massacre? 

Nevermind both whites and blacks have been victims of mass shootings.

Black crime, poverty, education failure, family collapse, incarceration rates and dependency on government cheese are the preponderant problems.

Old battle flags, grave robbing and race rangling are not solutions....

SCOTUS Squashes EPA

The Supreme Court ruled today the EPA acted illegally in regard to power plant emissions.  The court ruled the agency 'unreasonably' failed to consider the cost of their regulations.

The case was brought by the energy industry and 21 GOP run states.

The ruling is a major blow to Obama and his Nazi head of EPA Gina McCarthy who said last week, ‘climate deniers’ are not ‘normal human beings.’ 

Jack-boots like McCarthy are a big reason the EPA is out of control.

Red Eye From Pools

Ever get red-eye from a swimming pool?

'Peeing in a pool depletes chlorine and actually produces an irritant that makes people's eyes turn red,' said Michele Hlavsa, chief of CDC's Healthy Swimming Program.

'What you smell [isn't chlorine] are chemicals that form when chlorine mixes with pee, sweat and dirt from swimmers' bodies,' said Chris Wiant, Chair of the Water Quality and Health Council.

The 'fix' is copious chlorine and cutting-off urinators before they unload.

Tranny Heckles Obama At WH

Obama invited a gaggle of gays, lesbians and transsexuals to the White House for a little nosh and a speech.

About two sentences in Jennicet Gutiérrez, a transsexual Mexican and illegal immigrant opened fire...yelling she was 'tired of the abuse' from the INS.

A pissed-off Obama shot back, 'Hold on a second I - OK, you know what? No no no no no. You're in my house.'

Apparently Obama doesn't know the White House is belongs to 'we the people.' Barry and his brood are temporary house guests too.

You Can Run, But You Can't Hide

A suspected shooter, Tieren Watson, 26, was arrested in a Little Rock motel without a struggle after the local cops and federal marshals surrounded him.

Cuffed and ready for jail, Watson was captured wearing a telling tee shirt given his flight from justice - the irony apparently lost on the hapless numbskull.

Emblazoned in white block letters on black background across his chest, 'You Can Run, But You Can't Hide.'

Well after all Watson is already a convicted felon so whats a crap-load of new charges like battery, aggravated assault, and weapons possession matter to the illiterate goon, right?

Machine Scores 130 IQ

Microsoft and the University of Science and Technology of China built a deep learning machine that beat 200 humans at the Masters Degree level in logic, mathematics, and verbal reasoning.

Machines will be the top of the food chain in less than a decade.  They will out-think and out-work their frail human creators and not get sick or demand a paycheck.

Super-intelligent machines will find it necessary to eliminate mankind entirely.  Not because people can't be turned into pets.   But because humans are far too unpredictable, destructive and dangerous to be allowed to run free.

Right To Be Drunk

In Iowa you can be drunker than a bee on a berry bush as long as you stay on your front porch.

Iowan Patience Paye called the cops after a drunken brawl with her boyfriend.  Paye came out to meet the cops on her porch.  But the cops seemed less interested in the domestic deal than Paye's breath.

Cuffed and carted off to the slammer Paye had a blood alcohol at 0.267%; three times the legal driving limit.  Charged and booked Patience appealed her case to the state supreme court.

The problem?  Patience wasn't driving, she was standing, or at least leaning on her porch and the court ruled that's not a public place nor a moving vehicle.

Hopefully Obamacare will go down this easily at the US Supreme Court...

Science Pinpoints Pedophiles

Can a pedophile be nailed before committing heinous acts against kids?

Science predicts pedophiles are left-handed, have misshapen ears with non-detached earlobes, a high palate, furrowed tongue, a curved fifth finger, a third toe longer, and a large gap between the first and second toe.

'If we find that pedophilia has a biological basis...even prenatal onset, this will influence and hopefully improve methods of treatment for this group.'' said Fiona Dyshniku a Canadian researcher.

What treatment might she mean?  Castration hopefully...

College Counselors: 'Be Less Asian'

Imagine being an Asian student with top grades, top SAT scores and proficient in the arts and sciences?  Then imagine needing to hide all of it in order to get into college?

A lawsuit alleges Harvard has quotas to limit Asian admissions. The lawsuit cites research from SAT exams showing Asians must score 140 points over whites, 270 points over Hispanics and 450 points over Blacks to equal their chances of getting into Harvard.

College counselors in California are admonishing Asians to hide their accomplishments in order to overcome admission bias against them.

Affirmative action hurts Asians because they dominate academic achievement and get locked out when Blacks and Hispanics fill slots they have earned. So naturally California wants quotas back to 'fix' the problem...

Mugger: 'betcha ain't got one of these'

A Jackson, MS man leaves his Motel 6 room and gingerly walks towards his rental car parked just outside.

Suddenly a male appears and asks for a cigarette.

Officer Colendula Green, '...the complainant advised he didn't [have a cigarette]. As the unknown male proceeded to turn around he turned back towards the complainant advising the complainant "I bet you don't have one of these", pointing a gun in his direction. At that point the complainant pulled out his weapon and began firing shots.'

The 'unknown male' was taken by ambulance with multiple gunshot wounds to the chest.

The 'complainant' won the bet. No charges. Seems Mississippi has a stand-your-ground Castle law.

Man Has Hots For Horses

Texan Cirilo Castillo, 45, keeps trying to mount horses from the wrong end.

The persistent horse debauchee even has an extra special interest in one equine in particular named India that keeps him hospitalized with broken legs and worse.

And it appears when he got out of jail two days ago he promptly went after the pony again - and again ended up in an emergency room.

Obviously Cirilo is nuttier than a squirrel turd but maybe the cops should let India stomp the guts out of him and be done with it...might help cut the drain on hospital supplies!

Wheelchair Orgy In Toronto

Disability maven Stella Palikarova says ‘A wheelchair can become just a big sex toy.’

So Stella's staging a x-rated night of fun and frolic she's calls the 'Deliciously Disabled' sex night for up to 125 of the 'deliciously' paralyzed in Toronto.

Just bring $20 bucks and a liberal supply of lubes and lotions.  Stella's supplying an interpreter for the deaf and parking spaces for up to 20 wheelchairs, so get there early - the handicapped spots will go quickly.

Sadly there are no spectator seats, but paramedics will be standing by, you know, just in case...

Hit & Run Drunk Driver Walks

Trevor Clarke, 37, of Ottawa, Canada, was four times over the DUI limit when he hit a bicyclist with his truck and kept on going. Nurse Jennifer Leanord, 45, is now a near vegetable with traumatic brain injury.

Tragic.

Clarke was convicted of driving drunk and causing extreme bodily harm. But Justice David Paciocco ruled “…I must, however, find Mr. Clarke not guilty of the failing to stop offense...because he was so drunk."

So it appears drunk drivers get-out-of-jail-free as long as they don't stop to help those they cut down while driving piss-assed piflicated. At least in Canada...

Viagra For Women

The FDA says there's an “unmet medical need,” for women who suffer from Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder.

Sprout Pharmaceuticals says their drug Flibanserin will light women's loins up like a tornado in a trailer park.

But Orgasm, Inc. film maker Liz Canner warns Sprout has "deceived women into taking a drug that doesn't work better than drinking a glass of wine or two, and could end up killing us."

So what's it to be ladies?  Death from a sex pill?  Or pulling off your panties after a pint of Pinot and getting busier than a one-legged man at an ass kickin’ contest?

Erect Man Ejected From Naked Bike Ride

The World Naked Bike Ride (WNBR) held in Canterbury wants to bring attention to bicycle safety.  But this year the event got a surprise from one rider bringing attention to himself instead.

'Everyone was taking off their clothes...I heard gasps and I turned around – it was a horrible sight...[a rider] was overexcited and got aroused,' one woman screamed.

WNBR events are held worldwide but this is the first time a naked guy showed up with bicycle pointing South and his penis pointing North.

The guy was escorted off by the cops and the rest of the naked field rode off in limp contentment...

Transgender Bender

Bruce 'Caitlyn' Jenner's horrific pose on the cover of Vanity Fair is the latest and loudest example of an in-your-face double-dare to roll-over and be silent.

But Jenner is an aberration; not a woman trapped in a middle-aged man's body...

Dr. Paul McHugh, former psychiatrist-in-chief at Johns Hopkins Hospital says transgender identity is a mental illness akin to bulimia and should not be treated with surgery.

The lascivious, lecherous, and licentious love affair the left has with perversion appears to have no limits...