Fred Thomas got 180 days in jail and a year of probation for domestic violence assault and indecent conduct.
Fred invited his ex-wife to stay at his place one day last July. Sometime during the night Fred forgot about the divorce and desperately offered his ex $20 for sex. When ex-Mrs Fred said no, Fred took out his penis and slapped her with it.
Fred's lawyer excused the screwball behavior by detailing how upset Fred was over the divorce. It seems Fred's estranged wife was planning to go to Pakistan to meet a man she met online. Pakistan?
Well, Fred became unwound nonetheless and now will be trying to figure out how to keep Bubba's penis off him over the next 180 days. But Fred could be considered lucky given how other women have sliced off the offending article under past and similar circumstances.
The lesson is easy on this one. DO NOT touch an ex wife with anything that could be construed as a weapon. Even an erect 62-year-old penis!
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